I have talked before in this blog a out how easily the power of habit can take over, where I have found that there exist within me a desire to find a program of behavior that I can just stick to, so I can basically turn myself off and put my mind on autopilot – it is this underlying drive that exist within me, that was created within me through symbolic imprinting of experiences throughout my life, to live a kind of artificial life of artificial intelligence. It is fascinating how we as human beings become so robotized and don’t even realize it, realize that we have this tendency to want to robotize ourselves and find comfort in it.
It is an extremely effective control system because even if one has the absolute best of intentions, even if they can speak the gospel in perfect form, this intent/desire to do good is re-routed into the circular living, the circular logic (robots run on codes/programs of logic) where such intents become formatted, where ‘doing good’ becomes limited to only certain activities, and within participating in such activities in ‘autopilot mode’ where it just becomes a robotic pattern of habit, we lose ourselves – we are no longer here as breath in the physical body, but rather just existing within a program that is busy running/playing out. This is crucial because to live a life that is best for all, of real care and love for life – can never be a program, can never be defined only by certain acts – because in doing so, we deny our inherent ability to direct ourselves and live life in a way that is best for all in every moment, self directively – it is as though we do not trust ourselves/give ourselves the confidence to do so, and so abdicate such responsibility to a program. Eventually, the program takes over and becomes warped and a twisted mockery of itself, a shadow of itself, as religion and morality so often does – that is because these are, again, formatted systems of benevolence.
We as human beings are set up to do this and so our entire lives and all that we do/participate in become subject to/contextualized by this tendency to live systematically. If there are any criticisms of Destonians being robotic and merely ‘spewing the gospel’ that are valid as observations, it is due to this tendency, that, despite being educated on principles that are truly best for all life, the pre-existing tendency to format and systematize new information and behaviors can still take over – it is easy to ‘talk the Desteni talk’ – living it is a whole other story – just like Christianity or any other cosmology that has valid principles that serve life. The only difference with Desteni is the commitment to constantly self scrutinize and push self to be honest with oneself to ensure that this actually doesn’t happen, as we educate our selves to have a practical understanding of how the mind works in order to prevent this from happening, and hold a steadfast commitment to ourselves and life to persist. We work together and hold nothing as personal or sacred in terms of a moral ‘right and wrong’ – we assist and support each other and cross reference each other and do whatever is necessary to be effective in supporting each other – even if it means saying that which may be difficult for another to hear, within the principle of ‘tough love’.
I write about this point because I have had a bit of tough love myself, and found it extremely effective, as I understand how deceptive the mind is in, understanding that I am in fact my own worst enemy – and thus what may seem ‘tough’ about ‘tough love’ sometimes is merely how the mind perceives it.
Today, when working on a mind construct – which is extremely challenging because there is nothing programmed/habitual/pattern-based about it, you are walking mind constructs as the memories in your mind that influence you and limit you into patterned living, in real time – I saw the benefit of working in real time, in breaking out of habitual living, even if that habitual living seems just and righteous. It can be extremely difficult to break out at times, but the reward really is simply magnificent. I was having insights and old memories that I had long forgotten come up, I was having ‘aha!’ moments where I gained some deeper understanding into myself and my own mind, which is essentially the key to freeing me from the limitations of my mind, that really keep me enslaved. We tend to identify with our enslavement as something positive just because it becomes to habitual, we feel safe to live in ‘autopilot mode’ because we are taught that it is good and nice and to fear stepping beyond the boundaries of what we know as living life as a programmed robot.
But the reward of pushing ourselves beyond our perceived limits really are something that we can appreciate as we have never appreciated anything like it before, if we actually do it.