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Day 317: The Desteni of Living – My Declaration of Principle

I hereby commit myself to live the following Principles:

1.       Realising and living my utmost potential

2.       Living by the principle of what is best for all – guiding me in thought, word and deed to always in all ways direct problems to the best possible outcome for all

3.       Living by the principle of self honesty – to ensure I am pure in thought, word and deed: that my within and without is equal and one. Who I am within is who I am without and vice-versa

4.       Self Purification through Writing, Self Forgiveness and Self Application – the action of realising I am responsible for my own thoughts, words and deeds, to forgive myself for transgressions and change myself to ensure I take responsibility for who, what and how I am and through this know that I can trust myself to always be honest with me and so others

5.       Living the principle of Self Responsibility – realising only I am responsible for what I accept and allow inside of me, my relationships and my outside world and so with this responsibility: only I have the power and ability to change that which I see is compromising who I am, what I live and how this affects others

6.       Realising that who I am in thought, word and deed affects not only myself – but others as well and so with Self Responsibility in thought, word and deed – I take responsibility for myself and so my relationships to be Self Aware in every moment and live in such a way that is best for me and so others as well

7.       Living the Principle of Self Awareness – to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be self honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts / Mind is not what is best for me / others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others

8.       With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself – take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself – to give as you would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other’s lives and so my own

9.       Living the principle of self trust – as I commit myself to remain constant in my living of self honesty, self responsibility and self awareness, I stand as an unbending trust that I always in all ways know who I am no matter what I face and that in this I know, as proven in the constancy of my living that I will always honour and stand by what is best for all and so best for me

10.    Making Love Visible – through me not accepting/allowing anything less than my utmost potential, I support those in my life to reach their utmost potential, to love them as I have shown love to myself by gifting to me my utmost potential, the best life/living experience and show others as I have shown myself what it means to LIVE

11.    No one can save you, save yourself – the realisation that the tools and principles of Desteni is the guide, but I must walk the path myself. We are here to assist and support each other in this process from Consciousness to Awareness/LIFE and what it means to live – but the process itself, where you are alone with yourself in your own Mind: is walked alone

12.    Not waiting for anything or anyone to take responsibility for me and this world – but that I realise I have created who and how I am in this moment, therefore I have the responsibility to change who and how I am and so the realisation that we as a collective created how and what this world is today and so it is the responsibility of the collective to change how and what this world is today

13.    Honouring the life in each person, animal – everything from the great to the small of earth, that we expand our awareness and responsibility to creating the best possible life for everyone and everything and so ourselves

14.    Relationships as Agreements: individuals coming together using agreements as a platform to one-on-one expand, grow and develop as individuals in life and living to support/assist each other unconditionally to reach their utmost potential where the agreement is a coming together of individuals understanding what it means to stand as equals and to stand as one

15.    Sex as Self Expression – where sex is an united expression between individuals in honour, respect, consideration and regard of each other as equals, two physical bodies uniting in equality and oneness – a merging of two equals as one physically.

16.    Realising that by the virtue of me being in this world – my responsibility does not only extend to my own Mind / my own Life, but to the minds and lives of everything and everyone of this earth and so my commitment is to extend this awareness to all of humanity to work together and live together to make this world heaven on earth for ourselves and the generations to come

17.    I must in my thoughts, words and deeds – but most importantly in my living actions, become a living example for others in my world that is noticeable and visible when it comes to the potential of a person to change themselves and so change their world. So that more people can realise how we can change this world, by standing united in our self change within the principle of what is best for all to bring heaven to earth

18.    I am the change I want to see in me and my world – to bring heaven to earth is to bring into being, into living the LIVING PROOF of a PRACTICAL HEAVEN that can be seen and heard in our actions and words. We are the Living Heaven that must come into creation in this living world.

19.    Through purifying my thoughts, words and deeds – my inner becomes my outer, so I bring into creation me as heaven into earth, realising it is not enough to ‘see the change / be the change’ – for change to become REAL it must be a constant, consistent living of me through the words I speak and the actions I live visible and noticeable to all in every moment of breath

20.    Realising that my physical body is my temple – my physical body is the living flesh through which and in which I will bring into being and create / manifest heaven on earth as me in my thoughts, words and deeds and so I honour, respect and regard – nurture and support my physical body as I would nurture and support me as equals: my body is me

21.    We are the change in ourselves and this world we have been waiting for: and so I commit to dedicate myself and my life for each one as all to realise this, as nothing will change if we don’t change in all that we are, within and without

22.    The realisation that for me to be able to change myself in thought, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become – I first have to ‘know thyself’ and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honest and trustworthy person for myself and so for all

23.    The realisation that for me to be able to contribute to change in this world – I have to get to ‘know thyself’ as this world and so commit myself to research, investigate and introspect the inner and outer workings of this world and align the systems of today to present and give the best possible life for all on Earth

Day 298: Removing energetic attachments to process

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Currently I am on holiday and am getting a bit of a break from all the stimulation of being engaged in the matrix – work, school, friends, family etc. – so I am able to just come to my computer and write out points as they come up. On three separate occasions I ended up writing about the same essential point, which is process itself (my process of self change through self forgiveness and self corrective application).

 

The first writing was with regards to the positive/negative relationship that I have developed with process, where I allow my process to be limited and controlled by energetic charges, still trying to get some form of stimulation within my process and justify the stimulation as being necessary and real through the belief that this is how I must move myself, that there can only be self/movement as progress in my process if it is energy based:

 

on the ‘negative side’: I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I must be intense in order to affect change, meaning that I must use some kind of energy such as anger or vengefulness or contempt as my motivation for affecting change, not realizing that within such a starting point I am only existing as energy and thus change is not real but rather just another way to get energy and live/experience myself as a high, as the mind is so insidious and tricky that it will justify this kind of behavior as rational and good because apparently it makes some kind of change happen, when this is not in fact so

 

on the positive side: I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that I must ‘be in a good place’ mentally where I feel good and satisfied before I can work on myself/my process/affect any kind of change, or that things must be perfect in my life or everything has to ‘be right’ or that I must have certain wants/demands met before I allow myself to work on myself and affect any real change, believing that I need or require to be stimulated into some kind of positive experience as the experience of positive energy to be able to move myself, as this is just another way for the mind to justify getting what it wants under the guise of ‘doing something good/positive’

 

I commit myself to not move myself in my process according to energy as positive/negative feelings and to no longer depend on energy for self movement, but rather to breathe through energy and not act on it, even if it is presenting itself/justifying itself as being ‘for the better’/’for change’, I do not follow such desires as my thoughts, feelings and emotions and simply breathe through the energy

 

the second entry:

 

process doesn’t ‘feel good’ for the mind because in essence you are constantly correcting and disproving the mind, and the mind as ego doesn’t like to be wrong – what is then experienced as being ‘hurt’ and ‘unpleasant’ is actually allowing me the opportunity to learn and grow as the point is then opened up once the illusions of my mind are shattered, which is experienced as this perception of ‘feeling hurt’

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to limit myself in process by existing within/as the desire for positive energy wherein I place the condition on my living/application that process must ‘feel good’ as an energetic experience, within the belief that good feelings are what is important in life and that process as self improvement/change should somehow be a positive feeling experience – I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to make this association and within it, stop myself when facing points that I experience as ‘difficult’ or ‘being hurt’, especially in contrast to this belief, and within this not realizing that the bad feelings, which are essentially just a form of fearing change/tricking myself into not changing, is not real and just another trick of the mind experienced as ‘feeling hurt’/’feeling wronged’ by another, and I no longer allow myself to use this justification as self sabotage/self limitation as I see, realize and understand that this energy is not real but just the mind not wanting to accept the truth and lose illusions, unwilling to accept this experience of ‘being hurt’ and unwilling to support myself to breathe through this experience and keep moving

 

I commit myself to, in the moment that I am experiencing negative energy as the experience of being ‘hurt’ by others/’having my feelings hurt’, to stop and breathe, as I see, realize and understand that this is a trick of the mind as ego to stop self from moving forward through the justification that I don’t want to have negative experiences, not seeing, realizing and understanding that I am able to breathe through such experiences as they are not real, and just the mind fearing to lose itself/lose illusions – and thus when I experience this, I stop the fear through breath and keep moving in humbleness and humility

 

third entry:

 

feeling ‘stumped’ investigating words: I was not able to tell whether or not the word ‘process’ carried a positive energetic charge – but when I ‘talk it out’, it is like ‘of course it is good, how could process ever not be good?’ and then I realized ‘well, it is difficult as hell sometimes and not experienced as good!’ – so already I am seeing here how the word can easily get polarized – I also see how in looking at how I view this word, I was actually just trying to view it again, rather than looking at my actual experience of it, meaning: how am I living this word? How am I experiencing it n real time? And this is where reality sets in: I experience process as all kinds of things – specifically, I experience it positively as an idea in the mind, because process is like, awesome, right? lol. And then in reality I experience it as difficult and arduous. So the arithmetic here is quite simple. I am creating the negative experience in reality through the positive experience/definition that I have created within/as the mind – process requires no positive connotation/energetic charge, because after all, process is just common sense. It is who I am and the process of self discovery wherein I remove the layers of systems that limit me and see who I really am – and thus process can in reality carry no positive connotation because it is simply who I am – and thus if I am to live process for real, no connotations/positive energetic charges may be allowed to exist

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to have given process/applying myself in process a positive energetic charge/connotation as I see, realize and understand that my process is an expression of who I really am and simple, obvious common sense as the necessity to express myself as who I really am

 

Thus, I commit myself to stop and breathe where and when I see myself defining/believing/judging process to be a ‘good thing’/positive thing as if it were some kind of tool/commodity for the mind/ego, as I see, realize and understand the common sense of process and that if I continue doing it from a starting point of believing that it is good/positive, I am in fact making process more difficult to effect in my reality because I believe it will be fun (as the mind experience fun as energy) when in fact it is just straightforward physical work/application and carries no energetic charge, and thus I am simply setting myself up for disappointment as this experience will feel negative in contrast to the positive experience that I created in the mind which I then believe/expect process to be – I stop all judgments of process as they arise as my thoughts

Day 257: Looking for fulfillment

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This has been an ongoing point for me for quite sometime, although through being introduced to Desteni, and being shown what I am really capable of – that I can break free of my own self limitations through self honesty and self forgiveness in writing – I have begin to see that I can stop this experience of wanting fulfillment, of yearning for something to ‘complete me’.

I experienced the beginnings of reating this experience for myself when I was younger. I would often be left to my own devices without any real forms of direction, instruction or education, and had this experience of just like ‘being here’ – kind of like boredom, but more an experience of like – there is just nothing, like is this all there really is to life?

I remember experiencing this in my late teen years, or at least an outflow of it, when I would stay up really late at night, seemingly for no reason, just entertaining myself or listening to music or looking at things on the internet – like I was looking for this experience, this something that would fulfill me, in contrast to what I had normally experienced of life.

As I mentioned, when I found Desteni – well, life got really interesting, to say the least, suddenly I started to realize that there is so, so much more to myself and life, that I had never before given value to, recognized the value of, and that giving it this recognition was the key to living a life worthwhile. I began to see what real living actually is, and for the first time, began to learn how to stop this yearning experience – because looking for fulfillment is after all a desire – I began to see what life could be like without desire…it is beyond what one can imagine, having lived in a state of perpetual desire for so long.

And yet, learning to live this way is a process, there is all this work to be done to understand how my desires how, how I have created them, rationalized them, justified them – and so they don’t just disappear so easily. If I am not careful it is easy to fall back into old pattern and before I know it, my time is wasted and oopsie! There is this desire for fulfillment, back again.

So the key to stopping this desire to really live my days to their fullest. It is really as simple as that. Within this, I do have to be realistic about moving myself this way and to not overcompensate and become obsessively goal oriented, like possessed with the desire to make money and be successul and ‘live life to the fullest’ in that sense – no, that is a recipe for burnout. But I am able to make common sense decisions, in self honesty, to support myself – prioritizing what is necessary to be done, however not within the context of survival, or fear of loss as I am so used to doing.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to create the experience of wanting/looking for fulfillment through not giving myself/life the value and recognition it deserves in prioritizing what actually is necessary to be done in self honest common sense

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to go into overdrive through being driven in life by money and fear of loss, not realizing that this is compensation for not living and only fooling myself with the feeling/illusion that I am apparently living

I forgive myself that I have not acepted and allowed myself to give myself adequate support for my process and self expansion, not only throughout my day by taking care of daily responsibilities, but also ensuring that the proper amount of time is set aside for me to be able to support myself, investigate myself and do the necessary writing/work to expand myself

I commit myself to fulfill myself by living to my full potential, both through taking care of daily responsibilities, but also prioritizing in self honest common sense, what matters, what is relevant to my process and also giving myself the time and space necessary to support myself through writing and whatever other means necessary to support the physical and support myself to understand myself – standing-under and within myself as who I really am 

When and as I see myself going into overdrive as a heightened/excited state of mind were I am stimulated and having thoughts – I stop, I breathe, I see realize and understand how my energy I am experiencing is in fact a form of anxiety driven by fear of loss as the desire for money, and thus I see in the moment how my particular thoughts are specifically influenced/dictated by money and the drive to get money, and thus I no longer accept and allow myself to be driven by the desire for money as survival/fear of loss as my thoughts, feelings and emotions

Day 255: Who are we living for?

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So I am currently studying for my exams at University, and busier than normal every day. I noticed how diligently I had been working and how effective I was able to be with my work, by remaining diligent and putting in the time, focus and concentration. Yet something bizarre also occurred to me – why am I not always this diligent? What could be accomplished and what would my life be like if I was always such a hard worker? And more importantly, what are my motivations and priorities in life that determine whether or not I am a hard, diligent worker?

And of course it was plain to see that the reason I become so diligent and hard working is that this is something that indirectly relates to my survival – it is something I am doing for me, that benefits me. Granted, I would probably not be in University, as part of an overall effort to better myself, if it were not for what I had learned about self honesty, equality and oneness from the Desteni material, as I realized the importance of improving myself so that I could be more effective in making this world a better place – but more directly, this is of personal benefit. I notice the same thing when it comes to work and making money – all the effort and determination is there, because I see a direct benefit. 

‘No man is an island’, and yet we are conditioned in such a way where we are only focused within a limited perception of seeing the direct benefit of something to ourselves – our education of how this physical reality actually functions within a principle of oneness/equality is so poor, that we never see the greater outflows of our decisions, actions, and the greater context of life within which we make them. We don’t see the importance of living within such a context. This affects everything we place importance and value on.

We’re always ready to work hard or fight hard or do whatever it takes so that we have take care of ourselves and have the lives we want to live, or maybe for those around us who we value and consider as loved ones, or those we associate with in our own minds through associative cults like nationalism, religion etc. – but to act within consideration of anyone outside of those circles, well, it just doesn’t happen.

I will work, fight, be diligent for myself or my loved ones – why do I not work diligently in support of all life as one? It is simply not in my programming. I mean look at what typically happens when it is proposed that one live in a way that is ‘best for all life’ – and we have seen this a lot within the Desteni group – there is simply no response, I mean it isn’t even on the radar – or sometimes worse, people will actually try to demonize and slander such a proposition.

We should ask ourselves every single day, why are we not making tis world a place that is best for all life? Are we actually taking the most effective course of action to ensure that this world gets sorted out, or are we kidding ourselves that what we are doing is ‘good’ – finding and working towards pseudo solutions that do not in fact get to the core of the problem we are facing as a whole here on earth, but instead just make us feel good about ourselves because they relate back to our own identities in some way? If we actually lived and worked within the self honest and realistic consideration of what others as our equals/life are currently experiencing, as if it were ourselves or our loved ones – we’d be working our asses off in every moment trying to make a difference, because that is how bad of a condition our world is in, that is how extensive the amount of work there is to be done – it would take our entire lifetimes dedication.

I mean, how fucked is it that we cry for those who undergo injustice or suffer or die, when they are ‘close to us’ or ‘family’, while millions starve to death and experience lives that are beyond horrific, and we can just feel nothing? How does this not haunt us in our every waking moment? It should. I mean, do we even know what a ‘family’ is? The human race is a family. The earth is a family. The universe is a family – how dumbed down and limited are we? Some serious deprogramming is going to be necessary here, and some real self forgiveness is going to be required as we finally begin to understand how we have spited, neglected and disregarded life, how we did nothing when millions who endure absolute horror wished someone would come and no one came, while we obsessively pursued our own happiness, living in a bubble in our own minds. And if we don’t learn – well, all bubbles burst eventually.

 

Day 150: Self engagement and half-assed work

Recently I wrote a test for school, and I did not do as well as I had expected on the test. I simply did not know how to study for the test, and assumed that how I studied would work and that it was sufficient, although I did not ‘look into’ this point to enough to ensure that this was the case. Anyways after the test I did not feel good about it, it was the first piece of work I’ve done in a while where I really did not feel confident afterwards that I would do well. It had a huge impact on my self esteem and afterwards it was like I just wanted to escape, like get a break from school and everything.

It is obviously natural to get break from school work, life is something that should be varied, have some variety, the problem with the context of this kind of ‘wanting a break’ is that one will tend to go to an extreme to try to shake of the thoughts about one particular point and try to completely forget it. This is not necessary, as only self forgiveness on the point is required so one can stop ‘feeling bad’ about such an event and simply continue living. To continue living, and not being defined by this point, would be a ‘break’.

What I have also noticed is a resistance to doing work because I am able to write it off as ‘useless work’ with ‘useless information’, just because the information itself may not have a use or relevancy in my life – however this is self dishonest because the tendency is then to want to escape the apparently useless information with other addictions/dependencies just because they seem more relevant and practical, meaning that I am participating in them in the ‘here and now’. But within this I have neglected the usefulness of doing school work because it does in fact support me through remaining here and not participating in mind bullshit – addictions and the like. Just because  something is ‘more physical’ in terms of how many calories are burned in an activity and how much I am directly involved in it, does not mean it is not actually a mental activity in terms of it being an addiction/energetically charged experience. Doing something like school work, although not physical in the way I have defined it, is a in fact a very physical activity that supports me to remain here in the body because it does not stimulate me, and it is something I can get involved with and become keen on as it supports me this way.

I have had a tendency of turning those kinds of activities into just ‘mundane things’ that I must ‘just get done’ – not realizing the value of them, that they are not difficult or burdensome but actually supportive, and that they are more enjoyable when I truly allow myself to engage myself in them. I mean, I am busy doing it anyways, I am required to – why not at least enjoy it?! Especially when it is something that really is able to support me.

It is amazing how even the school experience, the studying, tests and everything is being turned into a mental experience through the mind, through judging it within the context of ‘success and failure’ – because this is the whole point of studying/school work as a self support, is to have an activity without mental definitions/energetic associations attached to it. The point here is to live, and not be defined by that which I am doing through creating such attachments/definitions to it.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to judge doing well in school as something good which apparently gives me more value and makes me more special, and conversely that I have allowed myself to judge doing poorly in school as something bad which apparently makes me ‘less than’ and lessens my worth – and that I have attempted to give myself value and worth according to a system such as grading and academic performance – within this, I forgive myself that I’ve allowed myself to feel ‘good’ when I perform well and to feel ‘bad’ when I don’t perform well, as a point of being energized through living out these definitions and associating myself/judging myself according to these definitions – not realizing that I am able to be in this world and this world system that creates such value judgments, but that I do not require to be defined by this world system that creates such judgments

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself  to – within the tendency to judge myself according to how well I perform in the system, and the belief that it is difficult/a struggle to perform well in the system, because I have in the past only done this within a context of judging myself according to the system which means that failure=a bad experience of myself – to want and desire to escape this experience because it is just too difficult or has imperfect results – not realizing that it is only my own self accepted definitions that I am trying/attempting to escape that exist within me and thus, there is no real escape from this – and that it is not necessary to escape as I simply require to redefine school/the system and who I am within my participation of these points so that I may enjoy myself experience and not be defined by them, and participate unconditionally where failure in the system is of no detrimental consequence to how I see and experience myself

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to define doing school work as not fun/not enjoyable and as just a task that must be completed and within this, I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to engage my work and myself and enjoy these points as it supports me to get out of the mind and stop addictions/patterns/habits/energetic experience, and thus I commit myself to be engaging and pro-active in my school experience, not within the context of ‘I am doing something good’ by engaging within this, but rather as a self support to remain here, breathing in the physical and topping the accumulation of energy

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to define what is physical only on the amount of physical movement that happens, rather than looking at whether or not mental connections/associations are created with an activity

To be continued in part 2