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Day 317: The Desteni of Living – My Declaration of Principle

I hereby commit myself to live the following Principles:

1.       Realising and living my utmost potential

2.       Living by the principle of what is best for all – guiding me in thought, word and deed to always in all ways direct problems to the best possible outcome for all

3.       Living by the principle of self honesty – to ensure I am pure in thought, word and deed: that my within and without is equal and one. Who I am within is who I am without and vice-versa

4.       Self Purification through Writing, Self Forgiveness and Self Application – the action of realising I am responsible for my own thoughts, words and deeds, to forgive myself for transgressions and change myself to ensure I take responsibility for who, what and how I am and through this know that I can trust myself to always be honest with me and so others

5.       Living the principle of Self Responsibility – realising only I am responsible for what I accept and allow inside of me, my relationships and my outside world and so with this responsibility: only I have the power and ability to change that which I see is compromising who I am, what I live and how this affects others

6.       Realising that who I am in thought, word and deed affects not only myself – but others as well and so with Self Responsibility in thought, word and deed – I take responsibility for myself and so my relationships to be Self Aware in every moment and live in such a way that is best for me and so others as well

7.       Living the Principle of Self Awareness – to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be self honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts / Mind is not what is best for me / others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others

8.       With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself – take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself – to give as you would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other’s lives and so my own

9.       Living the principle of self trust – as I commit myself to remain constant in my living of self honesty, self responsibility and self awareness, I stand as an unbending trust that I always in all ways know who I am no matter what I face and that in this I know, as proven in the constancy of my living that I will always honour and stand by what is best for all and so best for me

10.    Making Love Visible – through me not accepting/allowing anything less than my utmost potential, I support those in my life to reach their utmost potential, to love them as I have shown love to myself by gifting to me my utmost potential, the best life/living experience and show others as I have shown myself what it means to LIVE

11.    No one can save you, save yourself – the realisation that the tools and principles of Desteni is the guide, but I must walk the path myself. We are here to assist and support each other in this process from Consciousness to Awareness/LIFE and what it means to live – but the process itself, where you are alone with yourself in your own Mind: is walked alone

12.    Not waiting for anything or anyone to take responsibility for me and this world – but that I realise I have created who and how I am in this moment, therefore I have the responsibility to change who and how I am and so the realisation that we as a collective created how and what this world is today and so it is the responsibility of the collective to change how and what this world is today

13.    Honouring the life in each person, animal – everything from the great to the small of earth, that we expand our awareness and responsibility to creating the best possible life for everyone and everything and so ourselves

14.    Relationships as Agreements: individuals coming together using agreements as a platform to one-on-one expand, grow and develop as individuals in life and living to support/assist each other unconditionally to reach their utmost potential where the agreement is a coming together of individuals understanding what it means to stand as equals and to stand as one

15.    Sex as Self Expression – where sex is an united expression between individuals in honour, respect, consideration and regard of each other as equals, two physical bodies uniting in equality and oneness – a merging of two equals as one physically.

16.    Realising that by the virtue of me being in this world – my responsibility does not only extend to my own Mind / my own Life, but to the minds and lives of everything and everyone of this earth and so my commitment is to extend this awareness to all of humanity to work together and live together to make this world heaven on earth for ourselves and the generations to come

17.    I must in my thoughts, words and deeds – but most importantly in my living actions, become a living example for others in my world that is noticeable and visible when it comes to the potential of a person to change themselves and so change their world. So that more people can realise how we can change this world, by standing united in our self change within the principle of what is best for all to bring heaven to earth

18.    I am the change I want to see in me and my world – to bring heaven to earth is to bring into being, into living the LIVING PROOF of a PRACTICAL HEAVEN that can be seen and heard in our actions and words. We are the Living Heaven that must come into creation in this living world.

19.    Through purifying my thoughts, words and deeds – my inner becomes my outer, so I bring into creation me as heaven into earth, realising it is not enough to ‘see the change / be the change’ – for change to become REAL it must be a constant, consistent living of me through the words I speak and the actions I live visible and noticeable to all in every moment of breath

20.    Realising that my physical body is my temple – my physical body is the living flesh through which and in which I will bring into being and create / manifest heaven on earth as me in my thoughts, words and deeds and so I honour, respect and regard – nurture and support my physical body as I would nurture and support me as equals: my body is me

21.    We are the change in ourselves and this world we have been waiting for: and so I commit to dedicate myself and my life for each one as all to realise this, as nothing will change if we don’t change in all that we are, within and without

22.    The realisation that for me to be able to change myself in thought, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become – I first have to ‘know thyself’ and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honest and trustworthy person for myself and so for all

23.    The realisation that for me to be able to contribute to change in this world – I have to get to ‘know thyself’ as this world and so commit myself to research, investigate and introspect the inner and outer workings of this world and align the systems of today to present and give the best possible life for all on Earth

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Day 266: Afraid of self-responsibility

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For so long I have feared the idea of standing absolutely in my process, I have feared it and believed that it is totally impossible. I remember moments of changing myself, literally breaking physical habits with other physical activities, and having an experience of like ‘omg I can’t believe I am doing this’ – totally amazed and in disbelief within the context of the belief that I can not do this. In a way I fear to be the best I can be, because I know that within my preprogrammed accepted and allowed nature, I would abuse being the best or being great in some way. I mean I feel like any desire to be great, no matter how noble sounding, is something that can be so easily converted into an act of self interest as the ultimate starting point. From this perspective, I now see that it is necessary to forgive the belief that doing what is best for all is something that is noble and good and profound and amazing and special, and simply accept it as a common sensical expression of who I am, in understanding and recognition of what life as the physical is. 

From this belief, which is really just based on a point of inferiority as a self belief, the tendency to create and keep back doors open is expected. The point is not to compensate for the inferiority and try to be superior and do more than what is realistic, because I know now that every time I get a big idea about how I’m going ti change myself and the world and its all going to be so amazing and great. Maybe it starts out well, but eventually fades as it was based on the mind and an energetic charge created by the friction of both positive and negative as inferior/superior that exist in my mind as beliefs.

I fear to support others, not in everyday life, but formally through the life-coaching course that I am taking, and not progressing at as quickly as I’d like to. My fear is that I will fall and then I will disappoint the person I am supporting – and yet by allowing this fear, it is in fact just a clever excuse to not have to commit myself and ensure that I do not fall – in acting like the fear is real and I have no control over it, I am actually just trying to find another way to stay the same and not change. This doesn’t make sense, I should be setting these priorities and goals, even if they are difficult at first, even with all the resistance, because eventually it does become easier and the past habits that hold me back become irrelevant. I am not saying that there are not real world conditions to consider, I mean I can’t be unrealistic about how much I can take on, but I know I am capable of more and this is only possible by stepping outside of my comfort zone and accepting new challenges. Every moment should be a new challenge, really.

I’ve got to be practical about process and not put the idea of quantity and doing more above doing what is necessary common sense. What is the point of writing a JTL blog if I have not done real work on myself that day and made real progress: to look good in the opinions of others?

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that to stand up is something special or noble or profound which I am incapable of, due to how I had seen and defined being special and profound and noble as things that were virtually impossible to be because they were lived within a self dishonest starting point of self interest and a misunderstanding of life as one and equal – thus I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to polarize myself with both the temptation and the resistance to being good/great/noble/profound/special and simply see, realize and understand that this process is a simple process of walking with oneself in a process where I explore, uncover and discover who I am as life in every moment through breath and continuously stopping participation in the mind as thoughts, feelings and emotions.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to use and abuse the privileges and gifts I have found myself with in this life in the name of my own fear and self interest, not realizing that these gifts are here to support me as who I really am as life as my starting point, not to support my self interest and success in terms of having money, things and status

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to create back-doors in my process to not stand absolutely in moments where my ego attempts to take revenge on my by tempting me with the feeling/energetic experience I get from participating in the mind

I commit myself to stick to the simplicity of breath in terms of what I allow within myself and to stick to the common sense of not participating in activities that exist as old patterns/habits as what I participate in, in my outside world

I commit myself to stop the desire to be special

I commit myself to apply myself practically in this process in terms of putting myself first in addressing what really needs attention and ensuring that my work is relevant and effective, to not simply repeat patterns of things I know how to do already or talking about things I know already, and to rather walk my process of study, investigation, exploring, applying myself. I commit myself to never use process as a way of being special or getting attention

I commit myself to utilize the privileges and gifts I have been given to support myself in self honest common sense and to no longer abuse them in the name of self interest as the insane desire for an energetic experience of myself

I commit myself to live in such a way and make specific agreements and commitments to dedicate myself absolutely to this process, as participations/activities that ensure that I will remain here and continue to apply myself in self honesty and self forgiveness as breath

Day 257: Looking for fulfillment

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This has been an ongoing point for me for quite sometime, although through being introduced to Desteni, and being shown what I am really capable of – that I can break free of my own self limitations through self honesty and self forgiveness in writing – I have begin to see that I can stop this experience of wanting fulfillment, of yearning for something to ‘complete me’.

I experienced the beginnings of reating this experience for myself when I was younger. I would often be left to my own devices without any real forms of direction, instruction or education, and had this experience of just like ‘being here’ – kind of like boredom, but more an experience of like – there is just nothing, like is this all there really is to life?

I remember experiencing this in my late teen years, or at least an outflow of it, when I would stay up really late at night, seemingly for no reason, just entertaining myself or listening to music or looking at things on the internet – like I was looking for this experience, this something that would fulfill me, in contrast to what I had normally experienced of life.

As I mentioned, when I found Desteni – well, life got really interesting, to say the least, suddenly I started to realize that there is so, so much more to myself and life, that I had never before given value to, recognized the value of, and that giving it this recognition was the key to living a life worthwhile. I began to see what real living actually is, and for the first time, began to learn how to stop this yearning experience – because looking for fulfillment is after all a desire – I began to see what life could be like without desire…it is beyond what one can imagine, having lived in a state of perpetual desire for so long.

And yet, learning to live this way is a process, there is all this work to be done to understand how my desires how, how I have created them, rationalized them, justified them – and so they don’t just disappear so easily. If I am not careful it is easy to fall back into old pattern and before I know it, my time is wasted and oopsie! There is this desire for fulfillment, back again.

So the key to stopping this desire to really live my days to their fullest. It is really as simple as that. Within this, I do have to be realistic about moving myself this way and to not overcompensate and become obsessively goal oriented, like possessed with the desire to make money and be successul and ‘live life to the fullest’ in that sense – no, that is a recipe for burnout. But I am able to make common sense decisions, in self honesty, to support myself – prioritizing what is necessary to be done, however not within the context of survival, or fear of loss as I am so used to doing.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to create the experience of wanting/looking for fulfillment through not giving myself/life the value and recognition it deserves in prioritizing what actually is necessary to be done in self honest common sense

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to go into overdrive through being driven in life by money and fear of loss, not realizing that this is compensation for not living and only fooling myself with the feeling/illusion that I am apparently living

I forgive myself that I have not acepted and allowed myself to give myself adequate support for my process and self expansion, not only throughout my day by taking care of daily responsibilities, but also ensuring that the proper amount of time is set aside for me to be able to support myself, investigate myself and do the necessary writing/work to expand myself

I commit myself to fulfill myself by living to my full potential, both through taking care of daily responsibilities, but also prioritizing in self honest common sense, what matters, what is relevant to my process and also giving myself the time and space necessary to support myself through writing and whatever other means necessary to support the physical and support myself to understand myself – standing-under and within myself as who I really am 

When and as I see myself going into overdrive as a heightened/excited state of mind were I am stimulated and having thoughts – I stop, I breathe, I see realize and understand how my energy I am experiencing is in fact a form of anxiety driven by fear of loss as the desire for money, and thus I see in the moment how my particular thoughts are specifically influenced/dictated by money and the drive to get money, and thus I no longer accept and allow myself to be driven by the desire for money as survival/fear of loss as my thoughts, feelings and emotions