For some time now I have had a vague idea of what it is that I wanted to do with my life – to live in a way that I can actually make the biggest contribution possible towards making this world a place that is best for all life – changing the world, basically, through changing myself.
However applying this idea has not been so easy to do – this is a very vague guideline and as with the practicalities of like there is much to take into consideration to be able to apply it effectively.
I have at time jotted down what it is that I wanted to go in the future in somewhat more detail and specificity, but it has never been a sustained, consistent effort. The detail has never been specific enough either that I really felt confident in any form of plan. As I continue to apply myself on a personal level in striving to become stable and the the best ‘me’ that I can be, I realize that I have to develop a plan that I can stick to. I can even see how my tendency to sometimes relapse back into past patterns/habits is related to this lack of confidence, to a fear of the future that is so because my plan is not clear enough and specific enough to be able to stick to with confidence.
So tonight I sat down with a notepad for the first time in a while and made 3 separate pages that pertained to developing a long term plan: one was the immediate things I wanted to attain that were more personal and in pursuit of a good quality of life, like household items and other necessities and personal supports. The second list was a list of major things that I want to accomplish within a long term time frame that (for now) I can handle realistically, which is the next 4 years. Big goals and accomplishments that are part of bigger long term plan. The last list that I made was the day to day activities/responsibilities that I am required to participate in, to be able to reach these goals – the things that I can trust that if I do them every day, they will accumulate into success in the long term.
So this is only the start and list will be an ongoing point to work on and develop with consistency. It may not be much so far however this is by far the most extensive practical planning I have ever done since my process began. I have done similar planning in the past, well before my process ever began when my plan in life was to become a famous and successful musician in a band. I would be busy trying to plan out all the same points. The difference is that I am now doing this not from a starting point of survival and what it is that I believe that I want in this life, but rather I am doing it in self honest common sense within the consideration of the state that our world is in right now, and what my role ought to be within that if I am ever to stand as a being who is worthy of the gift of life I have been given.