Day 71: Not everyone is like me

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I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that although the mind consciousness system works in essence the exact same way amongst all humans, that the mind will take on various individualized forms that is like different mixtures of the same stuff as positive and negative opinions, where – based on personal experience of the individual, various things in ones world will be given positive or negative values and that this varies greatly from person to person which is why no two people seem to be able to agree on ALL of the same things

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that not everyone is like me as my own mind consciousness system has likes and dislikes that are opinions based on personal experiences and because my personal experiences were different from everyone else, my likes and dislikes will be different from everyone else’s

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that opinions that are based in self interest as want and desire are not best for all life and require to be deleted from memory

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that preference differs from opinion as each person is able to express preference as a form of individualization that does not entail separation from others as opinions would as opinions are based in self interest in a competition context against others – separating self from others/life

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that no matter how much an opinion or preference may seem real/valid/like it is the ultimate truth according to a logical explanation based on my experiences, not everyone shares these experience and thus another’s logic will be different from mine and the opinion/preference will not be agreed upon

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that my opinion/preference is right and thus others who disagree are wrong and that I have unfortunately cut myself off from having my opinions questioned and investigated through playing this offence/defense game of opinions, where I am unable to debunk and correct my preference/opinion if necessary – as one should always be open to doing as no opinion/preference can ever be the ultimate truth

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to be influenced by my profession to uphold and profess my opinions as my profession pays me in valued recognition of my opinions, as although my opinions are valued in my profession, limiting myself to the knowledge of an opinion actually limits me from executing my job effectively in a way that is satisfactory for both me and the student, one and equal

 

I commit myself to investigate and forgive all opinions so that I may see and live life as me, direct

 

I commit myself to ensure that all preferences are moderate as in fact being in alignment with what is best for all life

 

I commit myself to stop judging my opinions as correct and others as wrong – and challenge my opinions and allow others to challenge my opinions

 

I commit myself to be rational in my preferences through considering the experiences of all others equally so that my preferences do not become a self interested crusade of opinions

 

I commit myself to live common sense understanding and consideration among all others as myself as life to watch before I speak/act that that which I am speaking/acting from is in fact common sense as what is best for all and not just self interested opinions

 

I commit myself to stop justifying my own opinions through logic of my experience as not all others have shared my experiences

 

I commit myself to consider others as my equal as life essence yet differing in individualized self expression

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Day 70: Limiting myself to an idea of what I want in a relationship

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I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that I know what I want in a woman as having an idea of an ideal partner that would apparently complete and satisfy me – not realizing that the very idea that I need someone to complete me, which I will then desire and yearn for, is flawed in its very nature as accepting myself as incomplete and lacking

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to limit my enjoyment of myself and others to an idea of the ideal woman that I want to be with, as this idea is limiting me from experiencing myself and others and expressing myself with others unconditionally in self honesty and self awareness as I have instead attached values to the ideas of what I do want, and therefore ideas of what I don’t want

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize how extensively I have limited in only participating within that which I have defined as desirable as an idea of what I believe I want and the extent to which I have cut myself off from exploring my world

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that in creating an idea of what I want and desiring and committing to this idea, I am limiting myself to this idea and naturally creating ideas of what I don’t want – and that one idea cannot exist with the other

 

I forgive myself that I’ve not accepted and allowed myself to consider that perhaps that which I have created as an idea of what I do want is in fact based only on what I have already accepted within myself as that which I do not want and thus – my wants and desires are based on fear and exclusion

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that when I attain the idea of what I believe I want, I will then be happy, and thus I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to base my happiness of the attainment of something I have created as separate from me as an idea

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to reject others through defining others as that which I do not want/desire based on an awareness that society gives to them as apparently being unattractive in physical appearance and within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be told/taught by society what I apparently do not like and what is apparently undesirable

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear others judging me for being with/interacting with women who are defined in societies eyes as unattractive – as I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that being with a woman who is not attractive in the eyes of others/society will reflect on me apparently being unsuccessful

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to want to be judged by others positively for being with/interacting with a woman that society has defined as beautiful because I believe it will reflect positively on me as being successful

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to correlate success in society as being measured by how beautiful my female partner is, with survival and thus I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to create and participate within positive value judgments of females as partners based on fear of survival and the desire to be successful

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my fear of rejection by others and my desire to fit a mold that will be accepted by others is based on my own rejection of others and desire for others to fit a certain mold that I will accept, as ideas of what I apparently like and do not like that were not originally my ideas – but adopted and learned culturally

 

I commit myself to allow myself to participate in relationships unconditionally of what I preconceive I may want or not want, and base my participation on principles of oneness and equality as what is best for all life

 

I commit myself to investigate and explore and experience others fully, without preconceptions about what I may or may not desire

 

I commit myself to embrace all others as myself as a learning experience of who I am as life

 

I commit myself to decide for myself that which I enjoy and that which I do not based on principles that are best for all life as oneness and equality

 

I commit myself to investigate and forgive all positive values/opinions of others that I have adopted from my society and how and why I have adopted them

 

I commit myself to base success and my interaction in this world on principles that is best for all life as oneness and equality

Day 69: Self Portrayal

ImageI forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to obsess over how I portray myself to others and how I am perceived by others

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to create definitions, ideas and perceptions about myself that are positive and negative in nature as judgments, which I will then obsess over and whether or not others are confirming and validating these definitions/ideas/perceptions as real or not as wanting the positive ones validated and the negative ones invalidated or hidden – within this I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to limit myself to ideas and knowledge about myself in living a life where I am dedicated to sustaining these illusions of myself by obsessing over how I portray myself and how others perceive me

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to always want to portray myself to others as strong, secure, fearless, smart, in control, organized, superior, self certain, powerful, all knowing, talented, special, kind, good – and all other positive portrayals of myself that I have allowed myself to want to be perceived by others as, to create and sustain the creation of a character that is successful that was created in fear of surviving in this world

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to want and desire to hide any aspects of myself or my character that I or others may perceive/interpret as negative – I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to hide and fear that about myself which I have defined as negative in not realizing that to expose and face myself as the negative is to provide for myself the opportunity to improve myself and create a new self that is best for all life

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to project and portray myself to others as a positive character with positive attributes as I believe this will bring me love and sex – not realizing that the love and the sex can never be real as I am being loved for something which I am not – a character

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to give positive and negative value to judgments/perceptions/idea/definitions others have of me, and that I have also placed on me to fall into alignment with what society values, as I am life with intrinsic value as life and thus no value I or society place on me as a positively/negatively charged idea can ever be real

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to portray myself as a positive character to others within the context of character competition so what I may win the fake competition of who can be the most fake character through judging and comparing who is the most positive fake character

 

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that to fall into alignment with the character I and others as society have created of me, is to uphold the structure/organization of a society of abuse through the character relationship dynamics and interactions where we play the parts of characters that abuse each other and disregard each other as life by only recognizing/giving value to the characters that have no value in fact

 

I commit myself to stop portraying myself to others in ways that I will be positively perceived and to stop myself when I see myself portraying myself this way to others or plotting how I am going to portray myself this way to others

 

I commit myself to investigate the values which I have defined as positive and negative to see how and why I have defined them this way so that I may stop myself from limiting myself to portraying/living these definitions with understanding

 

I commit myself to no longer project myself as a positive character to others and no longer suppress and hide the negative characters that I have become so that I and others as me may recognize me for who I really am as a living, breathing being who has trapped himself into negative/positive characters that is undergoing a process of transformation through self honest investigation

 

I commit myself to recognize myself as life through daily self writing and self honest investigation as applying myself within my process

 

I commit myself to forgive and delete all definitions of myself which I have created as knowledge and information which I seek to present to others as who I am

 

I commit myself to stop using my character and how I portray myself as a means of competing with others within a societal context

 

I commit myself to enjoy myself as who I am as life with others and my daily interaction/participation through stopping the participation of the character as the self portrait I have limited myself to, so that I may love myself and be loved for who I am as life – equal to and one with all others